On this Valentine’s Day, we’re breaking down modern dating terms and giving girls advice on how to navigate new relationships.

• Talking Stages

In today’s age of Snapchat, Instagram and TikTok, it can be hard to see the effects of social media on our brains. The concept of a “talking stage” is typically defined as the period of time when two people are both interested in each other and are trying to get to know each other pre-commitment. However, most people don’t realize this term was not used until social media, particularly Snapchat, became more prevalent in teenagers’ lives. Talking stages are really just around because people have gotten so used to interacting on their phones, that they become too scared to interact with their crush in real life. If you really want to get to know them, ask them out on a date!

• If YOU wanted to, YOU would

A phrase I’ve heard from girls a lot is “If they wanted to, they would.” Here’s why that’s wrong: If you put that expectation on someone, you also need to put that expectation on yourself. Asking someone out can be scary, and sometimes we need to take a step back and reflect on our mindset. So the next time you say ‘if they wanted to, they would’ remember that you wanted to and you didn’t.

• Fear of Rejection

It’s human nature to be scared of what might happen. “What if they say no?” “What if they barf on me and start crying?” So what? Just say YOLO and do it. Nothing can happen if you don’t make it happen.

• Outdated rituals: It’s not the 1950s anymore

For decades, women have been told by society to wait for the man to do things for them. This outdated way of thinking makes women feel like they don’t have the power to step up and do things themselves. Instead of sitting around waiting for something to happen, empower yourself! Don’t feel held back by societal standards and expectations from others. #Womeninmalefields 

• Lack of creativity

If you ask someone out on a date, one of the first things you might think is, “Well what would we even do?” Well, here’s a list of fun, cost-effective dates anyone can go on:

• Boba Date
• The Canyon Club
• Go to the beach
• Have a picnic
• Go to Baskin Robbins
• Build a Lego set together
• Do an escape room
• Get different foods at the mall and rate them
• Go to Color Me Mine
• Laser tag
• Go to SkyZone
• Watch a fun movie

Advice from girls:

Junior Lia Langschultz expresses her thoughts about “making the first move.”

“I would say make the first move because they’ll know you really like them and it just shows them that you want to be something,” Langschultz said. “There’s nothing wrong with making the first move, just don’t be weird about it. Be casual, like walk up to them in class and say ‘Hey can I have your number?’ If you’re a girl just do it. It’s fun.”

Go up to your crush and try to show that you are interested in them, by supporting them at sports games or other activities.

“I showed up at his games and he really liked that I was supporting him and that cemented that I actually liked him,” Langschultz said. “Be supportive, even if you’re not in a relationship yet. Show up to their games or special events, go to their extracurriculars, or invite them to your sport or something that you do. Like if you’re in Choir, invite them to your Choir show.”

If you need the opportunity to ask your crush out, try asking them out to the Spring Fling dance in March. The Spring Fling is a girls’ choice dance, so girls go and ask their crush out to the dance.

“If you don’t have their number then ask for their number,” Langschultz said. “You can’t be afraid, because asking for someone’s number is so simple. It doesn’t even have to lead to anything. It could be like, ‘Hey could I have your number just in case because we are class buddies?’”

Remember, if you ask a million people out, one person is sure to say yes, so try your luck and ask them out before it’s too late!