If we could convince anyone to do anything, then life would be immensely simpler. From Oprah to Donald Trump, everyone has his or her own style of persuasion, some slightly better than others.

There is a certain manipulation and etiquette to swaying just one person or even an entire army of people to help you, trust you or support your opinions. Disclaimer: I am in no way an expert or saying that this always works, however with the right tone, diction and attitude, anything is possible.

First and foremost, persuasion is an entire language in itself just like English, Spanish or Hebrew. Certain procedures must be followed to convey a specific message and to speak the language with proper grammar. If anyone remembers the scene in Friends where Joey thinks he is speaking perfect French but is actually just speaking complete gibberish, then please make sure that isn’t you with persuasion. You will just be embarrassed and sad.

One integral component of persuasion is tone. More often than not, people are more influenced by how something is said rather than what is actually said. Please pay close attention to the volume of your voice, to your body language and to your general demeanor as you speak. Slouching is not recommended. Stand tall and make your presence known. No one wants to talk to your forehead, and they especially do not want to look at your shoes. Look them in the eyes. I am almost positive that they cannot eat your soul just by looking into your eyes. I think they have to march around in a circle and chant to do that.

Further, recognize that your words can carry a great weight and must be stranded together very deliberately. This is where diction enters the picture. Do your best to note the implications of your word choice when they are combined and stand as one. Never forget the sentences — Let’s eat, grandma. Versus — Let’s eat grandma. Diction is important considering I really do not believe that you want to eat your grandma.

Finally, please know that attitude is everything. Approach the situation with a comfortable layer of confidence but nothing too presumptuous. Be as polite as possible and gradually ease your way into whatever conversation you are initiating. Never begin with exactly what you want. Draw out the conversation and take it to a deeper level than the superficial small talk. Prompt a conversation, and be interested and interesting. Even if you are in a rush, someone will always be far more willing to assist you if you cared enough to ask about him or her first.

The other major key to polite persuasion is saying please and thank you. While this might be obvious to most, many completely neglect these easy and courteous words. A major goal in this scenario would be to make everyone believe that you are in fact British and do know what the seven forks per person are actually for.

Let’s look at someone who is not following any of these recommendations, hello Mr. President! He Who Must Not Be Named often speaks with great emotion and power, which I am in no way condemning. He is very passionate about building a wall and speaking out very aggressively on this issue. Passion can be great if you are not saying horrible things about successful and prominent women like Ariana Huffington and Meryl Streep.

In today’s era where women are empowered, fighting for their rights and enormously involved in the Time’s Up Movement, attacking two of the most influential and outstanding women in America will only backfire. Unlike the lovely president of our nation, there are individuals who do understand the concept of polite persuasion.

For instance, when Oprah spoke at the Golden Globes Jan. 7, 2018, she was eloquent and extremely poised. She spoke with great conviction, yet she did exactly what the leader of our country fails to do. She spoke without yelling, rude remarks, or even negative facial expressions. Her body language was perfect. Her diction was flawless. And her tone was even better. She shared her message beautifully without angering anyone in the room – all because of her use of polite persuasion.

Let me leave you with this: Next time you want something or need to persuade people to support your opinion, try following these guidelines. Watch Oprah’s Golden Globes speech and observe the manner in which she spoke. Attempt to emulate her composure and courteous nature. Maybe, just maybe, you will get what you want or find new individuals to support your cause.